READ THIS.. IM SURE YOU'LL LAUGH AT IT..

[yusuf]

Some guy posted this on the net. I just copied it and posted here..hehe...


Ok pare, was really uber bored kanina so I decided to watch Superman
Returns at Glorietta 4. I texted Claude and Jeff but it seemed the two were out
na naman. So I called na lang the girl Claude introduced to me at Max Brenner, a
couple of weeks ago. We traded number kasi before. Actually, she asked for my
number pare. See pare, I'm that hot! Kaya girls are all making kulit to my
friends for my number. Her looks is kinda ok naman. The 'pwede na' type. The
only problem lang pare is her height. She's like an arm rest lang kasi pare.
Pero I'm cool naman with it so ok na.

She replied after five rings with "Who's this?". I was tahimik lang on the other
side. Shit talaga pare! Major turnoff talaga! So I made putol na lang the line.
I hate kasi burara girls. Obviously she lost the card I gave her at Max Brenner.
Sayang talaga pare. I gave her a chance pa naman to be with me and she blew it
pa. She's bobo kasi.

Good thing my mom was out kanina so I got the chance to drive for myself without
Hilariously Stoopid messing with my aura.

So yun na nga diba? I was like riding on air with my uber bilis driving and it
only took me 5 minutes (which would normally take 30 minutes with Hilariously
Stoopid driving) from our house to Glorietta. Can't wait na nga for Drag Racing
Pinoy to reopen their site kasi I think I belong to that group. I can even do
the drift na nga pare while driving pababa at Rufino towers. Eh Rufino is
notorious pa naman for having the narrowest parking pababa and paakyat ng
floors. Yeah pare, I'm that galing talaga at driving so there's no point na
talaga in hiring stupid natives as my driver pa.

I got the last full show at cinema 2 (11 PM)... kasi all the earlier show time
were all sold out na pare. So I made tambay na lang at Starbs while enjoying a
cup of chino. I made no pansin na lang at the all the loser-poser orcs making
lipana around the cinema floor. I made it clear that my seat is far from the
masa-crowded timezone which is full of baho natives that time... probably
waiting for Superman din. I focused na lang my attention to my cup of chino for
the solid caffeine rush. Dami kasing attention-getters sa crowd and they are
irritating my aura. Good thing bilis lang mag fly ng oras kanina...

After the movie, I was like really disappointed talaga pare because of the uber
daming flaws. I mean, Superman Returns is the year's most stupid movie made for
stupid people and I am the one tasked to figure that out. Really disturbing
talaga pare...

1. Diba pare, Superman and Lex Luthor were of the same age lang? Diba nga
friends pa sila before they became enemies. How come sa movie, Lex was portrayed
as matanda na?

2. Correct me if I'm wrong pare pero I dont recall Superman and Lois Lane having
s*x to produce a child which is hikain pa!

3. Up to now, sumasakit pa rin my brain thinking how come nobody still can't
figure out that Clark Kent is Superman provided all the people at Daily Planet
are fond of detective work since most of them are journalists/reporters nga. Are
they all that stupid talaga or may magic powers lang talaga the eyeglass of
superman, rendering him incognito whenever he wears it.

4. What's with the kulot na bangs pare? I mean its pretty obvious naman na
straight hair ni Clark sa movie tapos whenever he change into Superman na, the
kulot bangs suddenly appear.

5. Superman is gay. Just notice the leg position whenever he lift his feet off
the ground. Kadiri pare no?

6. Superman is laging handa pare. because he only needs to make hawi lang his
clothes to reveal his costume. I mean, super lambot ba his costume for no one to
notice it while at work. Specially the Superman boots which he always wear under
his black shoes (?)!. The layered getup must be really init pare.

Now I know where the orcs got their style in layered clothing. Kaya naman I'll
bet an arm and a leg that Superman has BO pare.

7. There was an incident sa movie pa where Lois Lane was slammed on the head by
the vault's door which was made entirely out of steel. She fell pa nga
unconcious sa tubig. The question is, how come she suffered no bukol? Not even
minor bleeding pare. Eh it was like very lakas kaya ng pagkaka-slam on her head.
Probably she's hard core pare. Internal hemorrhage in the head. Big time!

8. After an earthquake, there should be a big tidal wave. That was missing pare.
I anticipated pa naman that part.

Dami pa sana pare.. pero I really have to hit the sack now. It's morning na
pala. Basta, I'm giving the movie -10 out of 10 because it sucked... as in
major!

Later pare.

[krayzie03]

ang yabang naman...pero tama dun sa superman.. :smyl:

[yusuf]

hehe..mayabang nga yung sumulat nito pero marami siyang mali..san kaya nakakabili ng cup of chino?

[-JaJa-]

ang kulet naman ng guy na yan.. conio ha.. ang sama nya. hehe..

[basstard]

:33:

[chomponthis]

may angas!

[Nen Emani]

Baklang-bakla.

[d_palapuz]

cup of chino pala ah..!
siya etong nag-c-criticize nung movie na wala nmn problema, pero siya pala ang may malaking problema..